Why did you start this blog?

In January of 2009, my favorite brunch location closed its doors forever; it was the unfortunate end of a twelve year run for the restaurant and a new beginning for me.  I put off starting my journey to find the perfect brunch location and instead brunched at various places nearby where I lived.  I soon grew tired and unimpressed.  Now, with this blog, I start my quest.  I live in a city obsessed with brunching and brunch culture, but I’ve yet to find a solid replacement for the restaurant I loved and lost.

Aren’t there other sites like yelp, city search, and zagat that do essentially what you are doing?

Well, yes and no.  Most of those sites and others break their reviews in to fairly simple elements and don’t really delve into their reasoning for what the metrics they use are and why they were rated the way they are.  Also, sites like yelp, though helpful at finding popular locations, can’t really be trusted for completely accurate data because one person that gives a place three stars could be another person’s two stars, and how different is a three versus three and a half star place?  You don’t know because it’s just one giant popularity contest.

What qualifies me to review food?  What separates me from other people?

I love food.  No, let me say that again: I love food.  As many of you know, there is a direct correlation between your sense of smell and your sense of  taste.  Before I was sixteen, my nose was completely nonfunctional.  Imagine living sixteen years with one set of tastes then having a door to a whole new world of flavor open up for you.  That’s exactly what happened to me.  I’m hyper-sensitive to smell—Macy’s perfume department makes me sick—and with that comes a more sensitive palate.  I don’t savor moments of flavor, I bask in them.

Will I let restaurants know I’m coming or alert them to the fact I’m reviewing them while I’m there?

No, absolutely not.  I want my experience to mirror exactly what you would expect to get if you were to walk in right behind me.  I feel that if you alert the restaurant or let them know you’re reviewing them while you’re there you run the risk of them trying to go out of their way to impress you and thus taint the experience.

What are my metrics?

Good question and here they are:

Service

• Hostess(5 points) (optional)

I realize not all locations have hostesses but they do play a part in your dining experience.  They’re the first person you see at a restaurant and generally your first impression as well.

• Promptness(5 points)

Are my requests met in a timely manner?  Does the waiter/waitress meet me shortly after I’m seated?

• Alertness(5 points)

Is the waiter/waitress checking up on her customers or does he/she seem to be unconcerned?  Do my water and coffee get refilled when they start to get low?

• Friendliness(5 points)

How nice are the people that I interact with while in the restaurant?

Food and Drink

• Price(5 points)

Is the price fair?  Do I feel like I’m getting enough for what I paid or are they overcharging?

• Quality of Food(5 points)

How does it taste?  Have I had better?  Could it be better?  Is it cooked well enough? Is it cooked too much?  If I specified cooking directions were they followed?

• Quality of Beverage(5 points)

Same idea as above, but for coffee, water, and other beverages.

• Presentation(5 points)

How does the food look when it arrives at the table?  Is it all slopped onto a plate or is it arranged neatly and nicely?

Decor and Space

• Cleanliness(5 points)

Does all the flatware, dishware, napkins, and glassware look clean?  Are there spots or food bits on anything?

• Theme(5 points)

Does is seem like there is a constant theme to the restaurant decor or is it a giant mess of things here and there?

• Adequate Seating(5 points)

Can I sit comfortably in my seat or am I jammed in like a sardine in a can?  Does it look like they’re using their space well?

• Location(5 points)

Is it easy to get to or is it hard to find?  Is it clearly marked?  What trains do I take to get there and how far from the station is it?

Bonus(5 points)

Up to five points based on something that I find interesting or particularly rewarding that can’t really be accounted for in the other sections, i.e. they make their own hot sauce, or the guacamole was made in front of me, and so on and so forth.

All metrics are added together and averaged both in individual catagories and cumulative.  Bonus points are added to the cumulative only.

What’s my ideal brunch?

The honest answer is that it varies from restaurant to restaurant.  I like a balance between sweet, salty, and savory.  I don’t believe that sour or bitter tastes have any place in a brunch, but that doesn’t mean I’m not open to trying something with said flavors.  What do I mean by sweet, salty, and savory?  Think pancakes, bacon, eggs with coffee and maybe juice or some other beverage.  The problem with going too sweet is that you’ll get a carbohydrate crash.  The problem with eating too much protein is that you end up feeling lethargic and heavy.  The problem with going too salty is that you spend all your time drinking water to rehydrate yourself instead of eating.  Like I said, I seek balance in the three.

Can you suggest locations to me?

Absolutely.  Just leave me a comment telling me where you think I should visit and I’ll put it on my list of places to try.