I like brunch.

Harefield Road

Restaurant Information:

769 Metropolitan Avenue

 Brooklyn, NY 11211-3701
Get Directions

(718) 388-6870

Service 11/20 or 55%

  • Hostess(3/5 points)

The hostess was just what one would expect.  She knew how long we were going to have to wait and who was in front of us.  She cordially invited us to pour our own cups of coffee while we waited.

  • Promptness(2/5 points)

This place was PACKED when we got there.  Though our waitress was quick to take our order, it might have been a half hour before we got our food.   I asked twice to have my coffee refilled before it was.  After the check came, I think we had to wait another fifteen to twenty minutes before the waitress came back to pick it up; word to the wise: pay cash and just leave.

  • Alertness(2/5 points)

This place is sprawling, add to that a very confused waitress, and you get less than great service.  There basically is a triangle the wait staff circles from the tables to the bar to the kitchen.  The fact that they were a victim of the water bottle problem only added to the lack of efficiency.

  • Friendliness(4/5 points)

The people here are really, really nice.  I think this place would become my favorite bar to sit and drink if I lived closer to it.  I’ve been here several times and you get that this is a family run place with all the hardships that come with it.  They have a few kinks to work out, but they’ll get there. 


Food and Drink 13/20 or 65%

  • Price(4/5 points)

I’m still amazed at how much food I got for so little money.  Everything was honestly priced or far cheaper than I would have expected.  If you’re in Williamsburg and strapped for cash, go here.

  • Quality of Food(3/5 points)

The food itself wasn’t all that impressive, but the quantities definitely were.  The first time I visited, I got the French toast and I wasn’t impressed.  The second time I visited, I got the huevos rancheros, which is a much better option.  My guests both times haven’t really said much about their food so take that for what it’s worth.

  • Quality of Beverage(4/5 points)

The coffee is so so at best and I’m not a fan of the fact I had to serve myself the first cup.  The orange juice was freshly squeezed and quite tasty.  Also, they have amazing Irish tea here, so if you’re a tea person, go for it.  As mentioned before, they suffer from the water bottle problem which annoys me to no end.

  • Presentation(2/5 points)

Presentation is not their forte, at all.  Really you get what you order with little effort put into making it look fun to eat.  Then again, you really can’t beat the price so I guess you get what you pay for here.

Decor and Space 13/20 or 65%

  • Cleanliness(3/5 points)

Nothing really remarkable to note about the cleanliness of this place.  Everything is as you would expect.

  • Theme(3/5 points)

It’s an Irish bar with a kitchen.  Everything screams Irish bar in the place.  Wood is everywhere.  I think even the owner is from Ireland.  Early in the morning, this place is more like a traditional pub, but as the day tarries on it turns more into a bar and hipster hangover joint.

  • Adequate Seating(4/5 points)

There is a ton of seats in this place.  My only complaint really is that the long bar splits the seating area awkwardly.  If it’s packed, take a seat at the bar.  If you can get a table, take it.  Also, some of the chairs are folding chairs, which makes sitting at the table uncomfortable.

  • Location(3/5 points)

The location is okay.  The only downside to this location really is that the sign is blocked by several others so you may not see it initially.  I think it is a nice hidden gem of Williamsburg.

Bonus(2/5 points)

Two points for outdoor seating.

Total score 37/60, with bonus 39/60, or 65%

Enid’s

Restaurant Information:

560 Manhattan Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11222-3913
Get Directions

(718) 349-3859 * approximate times

enids.net

Map:
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Service 9/20 or 45%

  • Hostess(3/5 points)

She was a fairly average hostess that sat us roughly five feet from where we were standing.  She then went off to find our waitress and was never heard from again.

  • Promptness(1/5 points)

There was a forty-five minute wait that turned into an hour wait.  I think we waited another fifteen minutes after we were seated to be asked what we wanted to eat.

  • Alertness(3/5 points)

I would give this a four simply on the actions of the bus boy, but the waitress was no where to be found after she took our order and the food was delivered.  She later reached in between us and dropped the check on the table before walking away to something else.  I actually got up twice to refill my own coffee and that should never happen.

  • Friendliness(2/5 points)

They don’t care; they’re not going to care.  To make matters worse, the bus boy took my plate with out asking if I was finished.  I then had to awkwardly sit with nothing in front of me as my three friends paced themselves through their food.


Food and Drink 11/20 or 55%

  • Price(3/5 points)

The prices were about what you would expect, nothing really remarkable or outrageous.

  • Quality of Food(3/5 points)

I had the biscuits and gravy which was only so so but I enjoyed the sprinkling of paprika for flavor.  My three friends all had the huevos rancheros, which looked tastier but not much than my biscuits and gravy.

  • Quality of Beverage(2/5 points)

They had a station for coffee at the door so you could serve yourself and the coffee was horrible.  Also, there was the water bottle problem.  The only reason this got two points instead of zero was my friends were raving about how good the bloody marys were.  Otherwise, I think they were really unconcerned about the drinks.

  • Presentation(3/5 points)

The food was pretty much served with out much thought to presentation, but like I said the paprika was a nice touch.  The huevos rancheros really didn’t look appetizing at all.

Decor and Space  7/20 or 35%

  • Cleanliness(2/5 points)

This place looks more like a bar that decided to serve food than a restaurant that decided to serve alcohol.  The floors looked disgusting and I would be amazed if this place has been dusted in the past decade.

  • Theme(2/5 points)

If there is a theme to this place it’s hipster posing and indifference.  I think the really sad part of this is that the restaurant is right on the corner of McCarren park and they do nothing to make it a warm environment that it easily could be.

  • Adequate Seating(2/5 points)

I think there is definitely adequate seating, but the tables were arranged in a very awkward fashion with our table probably in the most unfortunate position.  I’d like to blame some of the bad service on the table configuration, but really I can’t.

  • Location(1/5 points)

For those of you not aware, getting anywhere on the G train is the transit equivalent of splitting the tiles and finding the jelly bean.  Yes, you can get here easily when the G train is running, otherwise, you’ve got to get off at the Lorimer or Bedford L stops and walk across the park to get here.

Bonus(5 points)

Two points for having some of the most attractive, but poorly dressed, people you will ever see, seriously.

Total score 27/60, with bonus 29/60 or 48.33%

Roebling Tea House

Restaurant Information:

143 Roebling St
Brooklyn, NY 11211-3365
(718) 963-0760
Get directions

Map:
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Service  10/20 or 50%

  • Hostess(1/5 points)

I was baffled at how bad this hostess actually was.  She would wait for people to come in and put their name on a list then walk away completely.  She’d then return and tell them their wait time.  Once she thought she had a table for you she would then wander off again to figure out which table to place you.  I really think she had no concept of how to do her job.

  • Promptness(2/5 points)

Once we were seated we were instantly approached by our waitress.  We were left to ponder the menus for mere moments before she was back asking for our order.  My friend scrambled to order something she had no idea what it was.

  • Alertness(4/5 points)

I will say our drinks were refilled with out a heart beat being missed and I wouldn’t have noticed her if it weren’t for the giant bottle of water plopped down on our table.

  • Friendliness(3/5 points)
I want to say they were friendly, but really I think everyone that works in the waitstaff was just trying to act friendly but really trying to appear like they just don’t care.


Food and Drink 8/20 or 40%

  • Price(1/5 points)

This place was so ridiculously overpriced for what you got that I was kind of insulted.  I felt like my meal probably could have cost 3-4$ less than it did as could have my friends.

  • Quality of Food(3/5 points)

My chicken fried steak was delicious but the steak definitely wasn’t cooked all the way through and I could have done with a bit more of the gravy.  My friend’s dish was basically glorified mixed vegetables with scrambled eggs and bland as bland can be.

  • Quality of Beverage(2/5 points)

My friend said the coffee was nothing to write home about but they did have an extensive listing of teas.  I stuck to water which was served to us in an used wine or champagne bottle.  I was completely unsurprised that the waitress plopped a bottle down on our table, but it seemed like a pain to her to do it in the first place.  This is exactly why I hate The Water Bottle Problem, it turns the simple task of serving water into something that annoys you.

  • Presentation(2/5 points)

If they put effort into the presentation, it wasn’t on the two dishes we ordered.  Everything just looked kind of slapdash.

Decor and Space 15/20 or 75%

  • Cleanliness(3/5 points)

The plates, glasses, and flatware looked about as clean as I would expect, but nothing remarkable.

  • Theme(5/5 points)

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the decor.  This place would be amazing if the waitstaff, price, and food selection didn’t blow.  Personally, I really want to take my camera and do a photo shoot in the restaurant.  The wood tables and patterned wall paper comfort you and the lighting from the large windows make everything feel much warmer.  I didn’t get a chance to sit outside as it was raining, but that option is available if you want it.

  • Adequate Seating(4/5 points)
This I had a hard time grading, I’m not going to lie.  I think this place is actually perfectly designed seating wise, but because of the hostess’ incompetence interjects an unnecessary delay which in turn creates the illusion that there is inadequate seating when really she could split a four top in to two two tops or the other way around and be fine.  I don’t think though she had the capacity to figure that out on her own though and thus the place looked far more packed than it should.
  • Location(3/5 points)

The restaurant is just a short walk from the Bedford L stop or a bit further of a walk from the Lorimer L stop.  The wide open sidewalks make for a pleasant post brunch stroll.  The restaurant is just far enough away from the hipsters that you don’t run into a ton of them, but enough of them gather at the restaurant for it to be annoying and that comes with the Williamsburg location.


Bonus(5 points)

If I could give negative bonus points, I would.

Overall score 33/60 or 55%

Egg

Restaurant Information:

135 N 5th St # A

Brooklyn, NY 11211-3214

(718) 302-5151

pigandegg.com

Map:
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Service 13/20 or 65%

  • Hostess(4/5 points)
I was impressed by her, I really was.  She was friendly, you knew where you stood in line, and she gave an accurate time estimate for our wait.  She also was very respectful when she asked us if it would be okay for us to split a table with another group of two.
  • Promptness(2/5 points)
Do not come here expecting to get seated right away because it’s just not going to happen.  We were told a forty five minute wait and that’s exactly what it was.  We headed around the corner to a bar for a beer and chit chat before coming back to the restaurant; I suggest you do the same.  The wait for our food was short, but chasing down a waiter to pay the bill was a bit trickier.  They took our dishes right at the perfect moment when both my friend and I had finished our meals.
  • Alertness(3/5 points)
I’d say they were about average when identifying our needs.  I do, however, feel that a lot of their responsibility was shirked off to us due to The Water Bottle Problem compounded by the individual French presses our coffee came in when served.  I couldn’t give them a higher rating because of those issues.
  • Friendliness(4/5 points)
Every one we interacted with were quite friendly.  You got the feeling that the people that worked there really cared about making their little restaurant thrive.  Other waiters and staff were happy to stop by and help out when we needed so it felt like we had more than one waiter.


Food and Drink 15/20 or 75%

  • Price(4/5 points)
Considering the high quality of all the food products put into our meals, I want to say this was definitely a deal, especially when compared with some of the other places I’ve reviewed.  I’ll probably go back here and try something else when I get the time.
  • Quality of Food(4/5 points)
The biscuits and gravy were perfect.  They had just the right amount of spice, came out steaming hot, and the biscuits sopped up enough of the gravy for you to not really need a spoon.  The cheese grits I had were as close to the right consistency as you can get with out being there; I don’t know if it was the way the grits were cooked or the cheese that made them a bit too mushy for my taste but I devoured them any way.  My friend’s eggs and bacon were over cooked, which is a bit ironic if you think about it.  Overall the quality of food was very good, but not good enough for five points.
  • Quality of Beverage(4/5 points)
The coffee was exceptionally good, but not amazing.  My friend said her juice was really good as well; I’m sure it was fresh squeezed from their farm or at least with organic oranges.  I also should note that they suffer from The Water Bottle Problem AND your coffee is served in individual French presses.  This meant no refills on coffee and I don’t even think I was asked if I wanted more when I finished my mini-carafe; it was large enough for about one and a half cups of coffee, not nearly enough for me.  Also the French press annoyed me for the same reasons The Water Problem annoyed me.
  • Presentation(3/5 points)
Nothing really impressive here in the presentation.  You got what you ordered and it was arranged in a decent manner on your dish.  Plenty of room on your dish to move things around, so no worries there.

Decor and Space 11/20 or 55%

  • Cleanliness(2/5 points)
I found crumbs on my cheese grits dish.  They either came from the toast of my friend or from somewhere else; I don’t want to know, but minus one point.
  • Theme(3/5 points)
I’m probably being generous giving this a three but everything was very simple and that’s what they were going for in their theme.  There were fresh flowers in a vase on the table.  Also, there was a brochure about their farm and crayons to color on the paper table cloth if you wished to do so.
  • Adequate Seating(2/5 points)
We split a four top table with two girls that had to be the most vapid people I’ve run into in a while—one of  them didn’t know what the word lexicon meant and the other couldn’t explain it.  This place is popular and packed.  I also think it is a converted garage which doesn’t help.  They really probably need a bigger place for the number of people that get packed into here.
  • Location(4/5 points)
A short walk from the L at Bedford and you’re there.  Also, it’s a block off Bedford Avenue so it’s far enough from the foot traffic and cars that it’s not annoying to be there.


Bonus(3/5 points)

One point for having home made biscuits. One point for having cheese grits on the menu.  One point for growing their own materials and using free range chickens.

Total score 39/60, with bonus 42/60 or 70%

Gottino

Restaurant Information:

52 Greenwich Ave # B

New York, NY 10011-8309

(212) 633-2590

ilovegottino.com

Map:
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Service (10/20) or 50%

  • Hostess(2/5 points)
I’m not really sure if the woman that I spoke with was the hostess, a woman that was some how involved with the restaurant, or just a customer.  Also, the time estimates were vastly inaccurate.  When I first got there I asked how long it would be to get a table outside and I was told 30 minutes; fair, but what bothered me was I heard the same estimate given out repeatedly even though no one left in the time I was there.
  • Promptness(1/5 points)
I shouldn’t ever have to ask for my coffee twice.  Also, it took near half a hour for our food to be presented.  Our coffees actually got served at the same time our food did which spells major issue in streamlining to me.  The waitstaff clearly had food assignments as well as their regular duties and I think in trying to balance out the two they ended up being sub-par in both which was disappointing.
  • Alertness(3/5 points)
I’d say the wait staff was about as alert as I’d expect, but then again they were right in front of me at the bar so there wasn’t much of a chance for them to miss anything.
  • Friendliness(4/5 points)
Every one I encountered there was quite friendly, almost surprisingly so, considering how mismanaged everything else was service-wise.


Food and Drink (14/20) or 70%

  • Price(2/5 points)
This almost got a one on price, but I decided that the coffee was worth far more than the three dollars I paid for it.  I probably would have paid four dollars for it.  But, the food was way overpriced.  Expect to get about half the portion size of other places.  I’m pretty sure that the dishes were served on saucers or at least small plates, so you get an idea of what I’m talking about here.
  • Quality of Food(5/5 points)
Amazing.  The food was so flavorful.  Clearly the focus of this establishment was the quality of their food and they nailed it.  I had the over easy eggs with bacon, which might be the best bacon I’ve ever had.  It was served with two small slices of bread that proved a bit tricky with the flatware I was using.  Also, the food was incredibly rich.  I wasn’t full when I was done eating, but it sat heavy in my stomach.
  • Quality of Beverage(4/5 points)
This would have gotten a five, but the water was served in essentially shot glasses.  Also, the water bottle problem reared its ugly head here, but in the form of a giant bottle of water that was shared amongst several people at the bar.  The coffee was probably the best cup I’ve had yet.  It was rich, flavorful, with a hint of sweetness and bitterness, i.e. the way coffee should taste.
  • Presentation(3/5 points)
The waiter did an excellent job of presenting our food and drinks, but when I saw the small sized plates I instantly thought, “that’s it?”  The small plates were overflowing and I think that contributed to make it look kind of a mess.

Decor and Space (10/20) or 50%

  • Cleanliness(3/5 points)
The place was as clean as I would expect.  I didn’t notice anything especially clean or dirty.
  • Theme(4/5 points)
It’s a wine bar with a focus on fine food.  Marble bar with wine stacked along one wall make it glaringly obvious what they’re after in their clientele.
  • Adequate Seating(1/5 points)
I’m pretty sure the bar takes up the vast majority of their seating area.  Their indoor seating and outdoor seating looked cramped.  I’m not exactly a fan of them asking us to sit at the bar after misquoting wait times to me.  If you’re going to have that many people sitting at the bar at least give us stools that are comfortable to sit in while we’re there; I felt like I was sitting on a converted school desk.  Also, they could have taken advantage of their large sidewalk space like their neighbors did and fit a few tables there, but they didn’t.
  • Location(2/5 points)
I was going to give this three, as it is about a medium walk from the subway, but it’s located on Greenwich which means 10th Street intersects 4th Street and things get wacky if you’re not careful.  Also, it sits next to a restaurant that looked like it did a better job at seating and pricing items reasonably.

Bonus(5 points)

One point for playing Beethoven the entire time I was there.

Total score 34/60, with bonus 35/60 or 58.33%

The Water Bottle Problem

I know the last two places I reviewed served the water in one big bottle and I have problems with this that I’d like to expound upon so you may have a little insight as to why it bothers me.  I have two main problems with this: the water bottle takes up real estate on the table and it shirks the responsibility of the waiter off to the customer.

My problem with the water bottle taking up real estate is relative to the size, shape of the bottle and to the size, shape of the table.  On a small table, that bottle is taking up space that could be used for something else.  On a bar, it just looks awkward.  I know what you’re going to say, “But that’s how the French and Italians do it.”  Yes, it is in some of their restaurants, but this is neither Paris nor Rome.  Also, it’s not high quality water that I’ve specifically ordered that we’re talking about here; it’s regular cold tap water put into a clear bottle.

My problem with the shirking of responsibility is a bit of bigger deal than the real estate issue.  Your job as a waiter/waitress/bartender is to serve me, the customer.  When a water bottle is placed on the table/bar it says to me, “I can’t be bothered to watch over your beverages like I’m supposed to do so why don’t you take care of it yourself.”  Beverage service is a large part of the job.  I shouldn’t have to stop my meal at any moment do anything other than talk, drink, and cut my food.  Now, what happens if I run out of the water that was stored in the water bottle? You don’t notice, because you haven’t been paying attention to my beverage needs.  Imagine walking into court after paying for a lawyer and the lawyer just slaps a stack of papers down on the table, then sits down in his chair for the remainder of the case while he says you have to defend yourself with the papers he’s prepared; you’d be livid, or probably beyond livid; I feel the same way about the water bottle.  What if I’m drunk or just clumsy and I knock over the bottle? You, the waiter, have to come over and clean it up, I feel embarrassed, and we’ve both waste more time that could be spent doing something more enjoyable.

It’s just not worth it.  Give me a glass of water, refill it when it looks low, and be a good waiter/waitress/bartender and I’ll tip you well.  That’s all there is to it and it’s not hard.

Back Forty

Restaurant Information:

190 Avenue BNew York, NY 10009-3600 (212) 388-1990
Get Directions

backfortynyc.com

Map:
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Service (15/20) or 75%

  • Hostess(5/5 points)
I don’t think I’ve ever been so impressed by a hostess.  My friend had arrived shortly before I had, but the instant I got there the hostess came up to us and then asked us if we’d like to sit at a table or stay at the bar.  We were then instantly seated at a table near the window.
  • Promptness(3/5 points)
We were served in an adequate time frame.  Our main dishes came out just as our starters were being finished, but maybe a little early by a few minutes.  I hurried a little through the last half of my donut, because of this, but soon those dishes were removed.
  • Alertness(4/5 points)
There was a very alert and attentive wait staff.  At one point the hostess actually started checking on people and their coffee then went back to her normal duties when needed.  I don’t think my coffee ever got below halfway empty before it was refilled again.
  • Friendliness(3/5 points)
I couldn’t really get a feel for the friendliness of the waiter, he was just kind of there then disappeared.  He did seem a little hesitant to tell me what the jam was though, when I asked him.  The hostess was super nice and I kind of wish she’d been our server.


Food and Drink (12/20) or 60%

  • Price(2/5 points)
I felt like it was a little more expensive than it should have been, but not by much.  The three dollar cup of coffee was what sealed this as being a two instead of a three.
  • Quality of Food(3/5 points)
I wanted this to be better, I really did.  When the biscuits came, they were tasty but complemented with butter that tasted off and a rubarb jelly that was almost flavorless.  When the donuts came, they didn’t have the volume or sweetness that I would have wanted, a little brown sugar and flour could solve that easily though.  Also, I wish the raspberry sauce had been served on the side as a dip instead of drizzled all over the donuts.  I did love the hint of cinnamon flavor in them though and overall they were pretty good.  I ordered the “Eggs Southern Style” which were good, but the gravy needed a little black pepper added for spice.  They looked far better than they ended up tasting, which was disappointing.  My friend ordered the shrimp and grits with side salad, which she was hesitant to do.  I think she inhaled the shrimp and grits but lazily picked at the side salad.
  • Quality of Beverage(3/5 points)
I only had water and coffee here.  The coffee was good, but not impressive.  They served us water in a bottle and then let us serve ourselves, which I have an issue with always.  This almost was a two, but the creative coffee mugs made it a three.  The wine and beer list was notable and unexpected, though I didn’t care to use it.
  • Presentation(4/5 points)
Everything looked so good when it arrived at the table.  I could hardly wait to take a bite.  The problem with this was when I actually did take a bite.

Decor and Space (15/20) or 75%

  • Cleanliness(4/5 points)
I was quite impressed with how clean the dishes were.  The restaurant itself also looked quite clean.  I doubt you could find a dust bunny in this place if you tried.
  • Theme(2/5 points)
The entire time I was here I felt like there should be a plaque somewhere that said “Western Wall Theme by Ralph Lauren, available at Macy’s and other fine department stores.”  Also, there was a hook for a picture to be hung on the wall exposed.  To add to the confusion, they were blaring alt-rock from the 90s, which I love but it made discussion difficult.
  • Adequate Seating(5/5 points)
Very spacious seating arrangement with plenty of room for the servers to come and go as they pleased.  I think this actually helped the service ratings a bit.
  • Location(4/5 points)
It’s located in the East Village and a short walk from the 1st Avenue L train.  I think I gave this higher marks simply because it’s quiet enough and nice enough in the neighborhood that you don’t mind the walk.

Bonus(3/5 points)

One point for having home made donuts.  One point for having home made biscuits. One point for having perfect consistency in the grits.

Overall score: 42/60, with bonus 45/60, or 75%

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